Well, I basically got my rear end handed on a platter just moments ago on Facebook. I was looking through my memories this evening and I came across “I Was Dying”. I needed this reminder tonight. I was in my self-pity mood about a half hour before. Let me run you through my day of events. How a great day went to negative feelings and then to this.

First I was so NOT in the mood for another brain MRI. Here we go again is all I thought. I was tired and just not feeling it. I was somewhat worried yesterday but I said my prayers and that was that. Simple. No, not for someone like me. I have had anxiety where I just do not want to go anywhere, talk to people, touch doors, or just about anything. So sometimes this I’ve allowed to get in my way of “living life”. I ended up texting a good friend to drive me instead of myself driving. I needed the accountability partly to get this one hour MRI done plus chat with a friend I have not chatted with in a while. It actually turned out great! The open MRI room was gorgeous. I felt like I was on a vacation just upon entering. I think the idea is to release the anxiety and stress patients generally feel. Kudos to Rush-Copley Imaging Center in Naperville!!

Part One of my day complete.

Next onto waiting for AT&T to fix my internet. I ended up becoming a new internet customer of theirs. I found a terrific deal and I received my box to hook it up in the mail yesterday. Well, things were not connecting well. Low and behold when the tech got here he found out it had to do with how the order was placed. They thought it was just one house. We live in a house that is split in half. So, I apologized because I could have clarified my info upon ordering and when I called to see what to do upon setting the new equipment. AT&T were extremely awesome! They communicated with me when they were coming via text and email. Excellent customer service as well.

Sometimes in life we complain about customer service but was there something we could have done to communicate things better on our end. In life I have had to learn this before jumping the gun numerous times.

New internet set up and ready to roll.

I did receive news I actually expected personally. But my heart was kind of broken. I began to send a text message to someone and I said to him, I quit. I was so upset. I had my feelings, I expressed them, and I did not do anything else. Oh wait, yes I did I wallowed in my own self pity as usual. Why was I so darn upset over this? Because in the back of my head, my heart, and my soul I was hoping for a “YES”. But I was not prepared and I did not really put much effort into it this year. I just wanted to try to wish for the stars. Hmmmm, reality bites sometimes doesn’t it?

Here’s what put me into perspective shortly after I said my prayer. I was looking on Facebook at my memories and up came this photo that probably has been shared for who knows how long on my page. It is titled, “I Was Dying”. In a way “I Was Dying” to be recognized for something rather than just living it out. It is not about recognition in life. It is about how we see the big picture and not do things to ACT/SHOW we are better than someone when we really are not.

I do believe though you also need to be careful about falsifying someone’s talents, gifts, and knack for skills and abilities. You never ever should send someone on a wild goose chase if it is not worth it. Maybe direct them in a better path positively.

So I do feel better but I feel that I did not give my “A” game and that is my fault. I accept the responsibility. Oh being a grown up at 46 can be so complicated and over dramatic sometimes. Oh well!

I am truly grateful for this quick lesson God reminded me of. I hope you all of a “FABULOUS FRIDAY”!!

 

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